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Unapologetic Me


Taneise Perry, Be Glam & Grace, Co-Founder

First things first. It’s a must that I start off by mentioning the fact that this is Be Glam & Grace’s first blog post ever! (Feel free to insert a happy dance here.)  I am excited and ever-so thankful to God for allowing Malizy and I, who have been friends for over twenty years, see our journey arrive to what we believe is our purpose together.


A couple of weeks ago, I was invited to attend a Propel Women’s meeting. After checking out their website, I knew I had to go. The thought of surrounding myself with Christ-led, driven female leaders, coming together to study and grow in the Lord, could lead to nothing but blessings on my spiritual life and overall well-being. While introducing myself to the rest of the group I mentioned that over the last few years I was living by my motto that no matter the circumstances, I was “living life unapologetically me”.


I make this statement often and have worn it as a badge of honor. I wear it when I’m at my highest of highs, and I wear it during my lowest of lows. When I’m surrounded by people, I confidently stand in who I am, and I’ve made sure to exert that same energy when I’m in my darkest times alone. God made me fly, so I own it.


I’m a 40ish year-old woman, wife and mother. I am sometimes overly, and without apology, proud of my Blackness. Although I start a diet every Monday, I am confident, sometimes loud, dance when it’s probably inappropriate, have a red-lipstick addiction and often intentionally over-dress for absolutely no reason at all. I say what I feel and before those words ever leave my lips, I make sure that I mean them. I’m the child of a King, a city set on a hill that cannot be hid. But most importantly, no matter what (and again I repeat no matter what), I had refused to change or minimize any of that in order to make others feel more comfortable.


So after my “living life unapologetically me” statement to the Propel group, I was asked a question. “Do you ever worry about being perceived as polarizing?” My first thought and response was something I’ve been saying and living by for years – that being –“What others think of me, is none of my business!” But this question has stayed with me ever since that moment, and to a degree, it shook my spirit. The question was valid and something I hadn’t truly considered in my walk with Christ.


Am I okay with potentially being perceived as polarizing? Although I’m confidently standing in who God designed me to be, if others look my way and only see an unapologetic me, then am I living as Christ intended? I’ve decided that answer is and should be … no! If I am truly the child of a King, a follower, a believer, an example, then people should first see Him, not me.


Matthew 16:24 says, “Then Jesus told his disciples, if anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.“


This light-shed moment has pushed me to this: Lord, I am living life as the person who you made me to be and you want me to deny myself? (I have to confess that I chuckled after trying to imagine myself in the last day, sitting on the seat of judgment, trying to explain my flyness to the Lord.)


“Everyone will know by this that you are my disciples—if you have love for one another.” John 13:35


The bible also says that if I’m spirit-filled and spirit-led, there are some fruits that people should be able to see in me. Love. Joy. Peace. Patience. Kindness. Goodness. Faithfulness. Gentleness. And Self-control. Galatians: 5:22-23


I don’t believe that when Jesus entered a room he would have been described as polarizing, at least not in the way that I – with my Black fist in the air, red-lipstick, face contoured, outfit slayed, 4-inch heels, chinchilla coat wearing, you will respect my fly – could be perceived.


When you see me, I pray that you see Christ first. I pray that you see my cross as I follow Him; that you see Love. Joy. Peace. Patience. Kindness. Goodness. Faithfulness. Gentleness. And Self-control. And if you’ve seen all of that, if and only then, do I want you to see and respect all of this fly.


New motto: “Unapologetically Christ, then Me (Sometimes Apologizing)”


Taneise Perry

Be Glam & Grace, Co-Founder

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